See that picture on the left? That’s my signed copy of Fight Club; First edition, hardcover, personally signed by the man himself — Chuck Palahniuk. And I just love the personal message! Yes, you can stop bowing before me now.

Anyway, this post isn’t about me, but about one of my — if not the — biggest inspirational source.

People always ask me— No, wait… I’m always asking people, do they know Chuck Palahniuk? How I met Chuck was, well you know how it goes. Young, disillusioned male goes to the cinema. Apparently, there’s this really, really important movie now, called Fight Club. It’s supposed to be about men fighting each other and forming terrorist cells to vent their frustration at a society where it’s no longer important to be anyone — just to buy anything. It’s got Brad Pitt and Edward Norton in it. Pitt is still the pretty-boy, Norton still the skinhead. Oh, and it’s directed by David Fincher, so it’s supposed to be a really tense thriller. Enter this young, disillusioned male — me. Picture me sitting down, popcorn and soda at hand. The opening credits begin, the chaotic opening theme by The Dust Brothers, the reverse rollercoaster ride of the neurons, the gun in Norton’s mouth.

Fast forward 133 minutes. Me, along with so many others, comes out of the cinema, somewhat changed. The things we took for granted, the things we thought we’d never have the power to change— Well, it’s all looking a whole different matter now. I remember me and my friends used to talk, and talk, and talk about the movie — never tiring of the subject. There were so many layers to the story, so many ways to interpret it, Edward Norton’s voice-over was brilliant, Brad Pitt was a fucking legend, man! Helena Bonham Carter and — would you believe it? — Meat Loaf Aday broke our hearts. (And we thought we didn’t have one…) Of course, it didn’t occupy our conversation or interest all the time. But, nonetheless, it always stuck with us. It still does.

Fast forward a few years. I think it was fall 2002. Casually dropping by a bookstore in Trondheim, I was browsing the English section. And, lo and behold, there it was. Fight Club the novel. I already knew that the movie was an adaptation of a novel by one Chuck Palahniuk. I had been looking for it now and then, but to no avail. Then, suddenly, when I least expected it: There it was. Almost shouting for me to “Buy me, buy me! Read me, read me!” And so I did. After getting back to where I lived back then, I opened the book. ‘Tyler gets me a job as a waiter, after that Tyler’s pushing a gun and saying, the first step to eternal life is you have to die.’ I was hooked. Fast forward six hours without toilet break or food, only interrupted by the occasional cigarette. ‘Whispers: “We look forward to getting you back.”‘ I was exhausted. I was thrilled. I wanted more. Now!

And I got more. Survivor was thrilling, scary, funny, sad. Invisible Monsters was surprisingly hilarious, despite the gruesome setting. Fugitives and Refugees was the sort of travel guide I’ve always wanted to read, but no one ever dared to write. Lullaby was thought-provoking in numerous ways. Choke was the funnies yet. Diary sent chills down my spine. Stranger than Fiction took me to places and people I’d never get to see anywhere else. Haunted made me want to vomit.

The thing about Chuck Palahniuk is, although some would label him a shock-writer, his writing is so rich, so vivid. His words evoke such a range of emotion, from happiness, via frustration anger and fear, to heart-breakingly sad. He shows a unique understanding of humans. Wich is what makes his writing so real. That, and his incredible sense of pacing and delivery. Only rivaled by the best stand-up comedians. He is the only writer whose words have hit me in the stomach like a fist. And still, he manages to create beautiful and heart-warming (-breaking?) stories. That, and he can actually make people faint by listening to him read Guts.

But there’s more. Palahniuk loves writing, and even more he loves to share that passion with others. Through his workshops, wich are held on his fansite, I’ve learned so much about writing. Stuff that I’d never learn if I spent five years studying writing and literature. He’s shown me that writing isn’t — like some authors think — an excuse to not be with people, but the best excuse to be with people. I dare say, if I never discovered Palahniuk, I’d never (re)discover my love for writing.

Chuck Palahniuk’s gift to me is showing me the way. I now know that I want to write. There’s so many stories to be told, so many ideas to convey. And I’m the only one that can and will. For the future, I have a dream about holding my own workshops, leading the way for future writers. To show them that they too can make a difference. For me, Palahniuk certainly has.

(chuckpalahniuk.net)